Few days ago Trump aimed his magnum loaded with the 100% tariffs at the dragon, the tiger, and the bear (China, India, and Russia) and said: “Make my August 8 punks.”
Will the August 8 mark a new chapter in global trade history or be as impactful as a toddler’s ultimatum to bedtime? Both outcomes are possible.
Let’s run through the three scenarios:
🅰️ Anticlimactic Puff.
Trump shoots 100% tariffs into Russia only —a country whose trade with the U.S. is roughly equivalent to America’s annual avocado consumption. A bold shot, loudly declared … and quietly forgotten. Markets yawn, headlines cheer while Lindsey Graham dances in the streets.
“Mission accomplished,” says Trump, while Wall Street naps. Everyone exhales.
🅱️ Chaotic Inferno.
China and India get caught in the crossfire. The 100% tariffs are imposed. Suddenly, your Honda costs as much as a Tesla and ibuprofen becomes a luxury item. Rare earths vanish from military supply chains like socks in a dryer. Your 401K? Think waterboarding, but for portfolios.
Stocks bleed. Inflation parties. Uncle Sam goes coupon-clipping.
Biden’s drove bear and dragon into marriage. Trump with this move may drive tiger, dragon, and bear into menage trois.
🅲️ Existential Implosion.
Russia’s frozen reserves are confiscated in addition to Chaotic Inferno above. Global investors stare, mouths agape and then run for the exits.
Bonds collapse. Bonds and trust are two sides of the same coin. And without trust… it’s just paper. Foreign lenders ghost the Treasury faster than college kids ghost philosophy majors.
With trust shredded, the dollar risks being demoted—from global reserve czar to regional IOU mascot.
The Fed revs up the printer, taxes knock on every door, and your retirement plan is now two goats and a windmill in Montana.
So which will it be: A, B, or C? Only Trump’s hair knows, and it’s not talking to me.
…
I fed the above paragraphs to Grok. His comment was: Trump’s hair might not talk, but his Truth Social posts do. His pattern of bluster-then-deal (e.g., Mexico’s 90-day reprieve, China’s pause) suggests August 8 will lean toward Scenario A—a loud puff, not a tsunami.
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